What should you post on the internet?

My mother-in-law recently wrote an interesting post on expressing her views on her blog.  The advice from her readers varied, I agreed with the advice from an Honest Man of ‘As I get older I tend to the philosophy that venting one’s anger/frustration/…. is only worthwhile when it achieves something (other than the self-indulgent letting off of steam)’

My belief is that you should never put something on the internet that you would not want your mother to see or say something that you would not say to someone’s face.  Otherwise a blog can be used as a cowardly tool to express views that you don’t have the guts to say to someone’s face.  This can be damaging to the subject of a blog and the blogger is often remote from the hurt/damage they have caused.

What about sharing more personal information?  My brother-in-law has used his blog to talk about digital natives and he looks at the way people use the internet in the workplace.  I have some sympathy with Jaye’s comments as I don’t believe using a pc in the workplace makes you a digital native but how you use the internet in your personal life is much more important.  Therefore, a problem from my favourite agony aunt has prompted this post.

Quick summary of the problem – A firm has decided to recruit a junior member of staff online and the firm has rejected a candidate as during an internet search it is revealed that she likes to be ‘on top with my bondage gear and whip’.  The boss is asking whether a candidate should be rejected for this reason.  What do you think?

This is where I know that I fail to be a digital native – this fails my basic test of ‘would I want this information to be common knowledge?’  As the answer for me is a resounding no, I would not put this on the internet.  Would I refuse to interview this candidate?  It depends – for a junior post then probably yes.  While, in my opinion, it does reflect poor judgment – my opinion is driven by the fact I am not a digital native.   This leaves me asking myself, should I (and people like me) be more tolerant of internet exhibitionists or should the ‘youngsters’ who put inappropriate details in on the internet be aware of this risk they are running when they do so?

Should I be off or on the bottle?

Today is my last day in the office before going on maternity leave so I now have time to look at news websites in the morning.

Throughout my pregnancy I have abstained from drinking, this approach appears to comply with popular advice on avoiding alcohol while pregnant.  

It now appears, I should have been drinking as it is good for boys.  However, while it may be good for three year old boys, it may be bad for 5 year old boys.  My confusion on the right thing to do is obviously influenced by pregnancy but this does leave me baffled.

The one thing I am sure of  is that everyone has an opinion on what is good/bad for you in relation to pregnancy, child birth and caring for a baby and that everyone wants to force their views on you.

Off now for a Vodka and Red Bull.

What a shocker

Working as a consultant for the banking industry, it is very hard to keep up to date with changes in the market.  I am trying hard by reading a couple of news websites on a regular basis.

While financial services is my professional interest, I also like cats.  Therefore, my eyes were drawn to the photograph below… 

…especially because it reminded me of happier times at home -

Imagine my horror, when I read the story and discovered it was about a cat eating festival in Peru.

Mr Tosh has already been grumbled at because Ginny and I could not watch Big Cat Week on Monday as it was ‘too upsetting’ but he does not call to warn me about the mean story lurking behind the cute cat photo. 

When I have more time, I may even start a campaign to ensure adequate risk warnings are put on these links.  Just like the risk warnings they have on cds and financial services products.

Punishing Wall Street

Last night, I went to bed assuming that I was confused about the US House of Representatives voting ‘no’ to the rescue package.  However, with the benefit of sleep it became clear that my confusion was actually disbelief.

What I find the most disconcerting is the will of the American people to let Wall Street suffer – especially the rich bankers who are being blamed for this.  There appears to be no recognition that what happens to Wall Street may have a direct impact on Main Street.  An article in Money Marketing highlights how pain in Wall Street will be felt by regular Americans.  Their pensions and investments will be falling in value, they will get less interest in their accounts as the Fed cuts interest rates, they will find it mush harder to access mainstream financial services and will suffer from the job insecurity due as their employers also struggle to access financial products.

This is a classic case of cutting your nose off to spite your face.   It is easy to blame the banking industry for this, but this is a time for resolution rather than blame management.

How to make work a better place

I believe it is true to say that banking is a tough environment at the moment.  I generally enjoy my job and the opportunities it provides me, however improvements can always be made to my working environment.  True I have chilled water, air con, ergonomically designed chair and desk, and all the mod cons I could wish for.  BUT my office is missing the softer side of life.  Shiona Tregaskis writes about bringing our pets into work with us.   While Shiona is not convinced it is a good idea, I believe it is a fantastic idea.

I would love for my team to bring in pets.  As I am the only mad cat lady in the team, Ginster would have free run of the office and would definitely increase morale and probably increase productivity.  Mr Tosh often says that Ginny supported him throughout his MBA studies and the cat has a wealth of knowledge to contribute.

She is already pc proficient -

and I would be willing to work later, as I often have to rush home to get dinner ready for her.

In addition to Ginny’s technical input, she is a great stress reliever.

The only problem I see with this is Mr Tosh may get jealous…

Friday happiness

I always really enjoy the Guardian’s ‘week in wildlife’ and while I am still developing posts on Polly’s article on bankers earnings and the role of women in society, something more light-hearted is in order.

First picture that piqued my interested was Putin holding the paw of an ‘temporarily immobilised’ tigress.  Interesting for 2 reasons: 1. if the tiger had been ‘permanently immobilised’ it probably would have caused more outrage that the trouble in Georgia and 2. it is a big paw.  I think Ginny believes that tigers are slightly smaller than her based on clear photographic evidence…

 

The other photo I loved was this.  Loved it just because it is sooooo cute.

It is a tough life being a wife

Yesterday’s news highlighted how tough it is to keep a husband happy.  

Firstly, there was the guilty verdict for Anne Darwin – a wife who pleaded innocent to fraud charges due to ‘marital coercion’.

The Telegraph also published an article on how wives should appreciate their husbands more when they work hard.  I am not a regular reader of the Telegraph and this was sent to me by Mr Tosh with the note ‘Thought you’d like this. Especially the tips on how you could improve.’

As a keen advocate on self-improvement, I read the article, with a focus on the instructions from Mr Tosh.  I self-assessed my performance against the tips and hopefully I already behave like his PA, am generally not jealous of his career and I try very hard to keep busy with both a career and a course.  So I am now left wondering what else I need to do…

However, after a week on holiday reading the Daily Mail and prompted by these two articles I have come to the conclusion that I can’t win, so will not bother to even try!

Problem – ‘I’m just too good to be successful’

I always smile when I see this as self-analysis.  So when a similar quote was featured on the front page of the FT today, I could not help myself and immediately turned to page 16.

Lucy Kellaway deals with a question about an unhappy person who sees ’selfish people with no backbone’ advance faster on the career ladder. As they feel ‘no guilt about their actions’ they are happier and more successful.  There is also the implication that those suited to professional life feel no guilt, are selfish and lack a backbone.  Hmmmm, I definitely have a backbone.

Lucy is fantastically diplomatic, she asks the question if this unhappy person colleagues are stealing money.  If not, she replies, ‘if they are simply more motivated by self-advancement than by bettering the lot of all mankind, then I’m surprised it has taken you 20 years to work this out. To succeed in the City – or in any business – one needs to want to succeed desperately. And that generally means being more self-regarding than, say, Mother Teresa.’ 

She also states ‘I don’t accept that everyone who does well in the City is particularly horrid’  I agree with this.  Financial Services is competitive but generally an honest professional.  In my years of working, I have not yet met someone who wants to rip off customers/shareholders/colleagues.  When mistakes do happen, swift action is taken to remedy it.  Faster action than you see in many other industries and professions.  And the industry is honest about mistakes and takes steps to remedy them.  How often do you hear Unions talk about the competence of their staff ‘not being good enough’?

Finally she states – ‘Perhaps all you are really saying is that you despise your colleagues or that you are sick of banking. In that case you have reached the end and must go’  Hurrah

I never understand someone who sticks at a job they hate and then continually moan about it.  It is an effective but unpleasant way of sharing the pain.  There are lots of people who want to work in Banking, let them have the job and be happy.

Aiming for moderate success

Back at Warwick again – this time it is business modelling and analysis.  My experience of business modellers is that they all have a PhD and think in a way I am not capable of.

So far, course is interesting but still need to do my homework on regression analysis…

Luke many others, I am reading a paper rather than getting stuck into my homework – how I ‘laughed’ at this articlein the FT  It appears that sportiness is more important than academic prowess.  Perhaps Mr Tosh is doing me a favour when football is continually on the tv – helping me to get my college degree in soccer.

Seriously though, it does suggest that emotional intelligence is more important than brain power alone.

Do you think that will act as a good enough excuse not to run my regression testing on manufacturing data??

To buy or not to buy

I am suffering from a personal dilemma.  While doing some research I stumbled across Christopher Flett and his book ‘What Men Don’t Tell Women About Business: Opening Up the Heavily Guarded Alpha Male Playbook’

The book description and the profile of the author, (a man who gives 40-60 speeches a year to women on corporate life), makes me think that the book will be a pile of condescending nonsense.  Spending the main chunk of my time in corporate life as opposed to the little time I spend in academia I know how different the cultures are.  I am also put off by professional speech givers unless they are of the after-dinner type.  As a rule they are bores.

If this was book written by Nicola Horlick, I would have already bought it.  However the credentials of a male Canadian professional talker and academic isn’t quite so appealling.

So do I

1. Buy the book and challenge my preconceptions

2. Not buy the book in the belief that life is too short and there are lots of good books that I know I would enjoy